These are images of an exquisite broadside catalog for Auerhahn Press, published and printed in 1959 by Dave Haselwood, aka Joko, our zen teacher at Empty Bowl Sangha. Joko gave this to me once when we had lunch, after I expressed interest in his life as a beat printer. Continue reading I have seen the grey birds, Winter driven
Sultans of Swing
No money in our jackets and our jeans are torn
Your hands are cold but your lips are warm
—Down To The Waterline, Dire Straits
Thistledown
I walk up the hill; the friend I’m house-sitting for told me I could see the bay from here, at the top. A ragged sob chokes out of my chest, partly from the exertion of the climb, partly from my purpose in coming here. I’m on a mission.
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Grief Eight Ways
There is the grief of anger; the futile grief of throwing things at a wall that isn’t there.
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Pentecost
My parents didn’t drink much. Sweet wine with Sunday dinner; maybe a can of beer with pizza on Saturday night. There were some bottles of liquor that would come out if there were visitors on Christmas, and a bottle of whiskey that came out for a couple of male visitors: a family friend who was like a grandfather to us, and the monsignor from church.
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The Draft
Some of my best learning experiences have been on-the-job. Sometimes those have been “fake” jobs (setting myself up as a Point Reyes or permaculture blogger). Sometimes they’re the real deal: working on a goat ranch, or joining Peace Corps. All of them lead to wonderful adventures.
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Josie
My youngest brother was born with Hyaline Membrane Disease, on my first day of kindergarten. While my mother and father kept vigil at the hospital in Toledo, my grandma came to stay with us.
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Clay Pigeons
One time I came back to visit my family, after college I think, and Dad had the trap and some clay pigeons out. He got the shotgun and my brothers were shooting at clay pigeons. And missing.
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The Stash
When I was 17, I got a summer job working at a planetarium that was about an hour’s drive away from home. The job was supposed to be a way for me to get an advantage on college and scholarship applications. Secretly, I most excited for the chance to get away from home. I had been dreaming of running away for years.
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Saying Goodbye
There was a lot of activity leading up to my send-off that I knew was related to it. Continue reading Saying Goodbye