My last name has changed back as part of the divorce. I like to say that I’m taking the name of my niece and nephew, because they took such good care of me last fall, and because I hate the idea of going back to anything. Whatever the case, it now means a series of trips through bureaucracies to do the name change.

The social security office was my first stop, and relatively painless. In a few days, my new card arrived in the mail, and I was able to start the next round: the dreaded DMV. I didn’t mind having to get a new license; just last December I’d had to have my license renewed and a new photo taken. My photo was predictably horrible, my face swollen by weeks of crying and the last vestiges of alcohol. I felt lucky to replace it. That horrible version of my driver’s license had replaced the one I got when my name changed before, one of my best ID photos ever: a newlywed.

So I took the day off work, took a water bottle and plenty of things to keep myself busy, and sat in the DMV office for a couple of hours until my name was called. I approached the clerk and handed over my papers, bracing myself for bad news about something I missed or something I’d done wrong.

The clerk smiled as he took my papers, looked over my name change form and my social security card. Then he stopped, looked up at me, smiled, and said, “You’re a brand new person!”

“I guess so.” I said.

He looked through the rest of my papers, came to the court papers, made a couple notations on the computer. Then he looked up again, and said, quietly and sincerely, “I’m sorry for the reason.”

I thanked him but also innerly cursed him as the tears welled up in my eyes. I never know when it’s going to hit me again. And there’s something about this simple, heartfelt human contact that always makes me cry. I can stand just about anything other than a little tenderness.

Trying to lighten the mood and avoid having a teary photo taken, I joked with him. “Don’t you think I look better now?”

He agreed. “You’re all set now. Take these over to window 18 and they’ll get your new photo.”